Enigma
by Bowsergal
Summary: The simple question turns itself over and over in his mind. The ground beneath his psyche breaks.[XiaoXDoctor][slash][sort of set in Don't Call Me Cinderellaverse][oneshot]


**AN:** A little drabbly thing. X3 Doctor is weird.

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything in this. Not a thing.

The streets were busy at this time of night, Kanzaki noted coolly, thin plastic bag tapping against his thigh as he waited for the light to change. The man stood alone on the street corner, but several cars sped past, causing the ever-present lab coat he wore to wave in the wind. Frowning at the chill, the dark-haired man pulled his coat tighter around him. The white cotton did little to relieve the cold. Finally, the traffic came to a stop, and he plodded across the pavement.

The change from his purchases rattled in his pocket. He'd need to remember to return that to Xiao. What _exactly_ did that man want from him, anyway? Kanzaki had never shown a shred of kindess to the other, yet he was willing to take the scientist in without a word. He'd opened his home to the man, and held his tongue at the other's numerous complaints, while making none of his own.

Kanzaki, who'd been competing all his life, who'd been the best, the most independant, was being sheltered by someone, weeks before, he would have gladly killed, or even worse, used him as a test subject without a second thought.

What did he want from Doctor? The question rang again and again in his head. It was unbearable, and the question drowned out all other thought, like a siren, blaring, repeating, his inner voice pushing him under the wave, the phrase bouncing around and around inside his head.

What _could_ he want from Kanzaki? He had no money; his research was lost, permanantly erased and overwritten and erased and overwritten again, unusable; his intellect was rendered useless without that research as well, he had nothing to apply it to. All his life, the bespectacled man had dedicated his efforts toward one outlet, one perfect purpose: the furtherment of science; even as a child, Kanzaki had a need to surpass and create new fields. Science was his _life_; everything else was secondary.

Even in joining with the Apostles of the Stars, his motivation was not to save the world, like most of the others, but to find out how the mysterious Tao could be harnessed, how it could be measured, how it could be observed.

Doctor had never thought of himself as a person, merely a tool for science. He didn't deserve a name, no, he was "Doctor," and that was all. Come to think of it, without science, Doctor was no longer even a tool. He was a shell, without purpose. A waste of space.

Useless.

Powerless.

Worthless.

The man wasn't even seeing now, his gaze was unfocused and far away.

_Worthless, worthless._

He'd already passed Xiao's flat, but he couldn't stop walking.

_Nothing, you're nothing at all._

Kanzaki was too far inside himself, swimming in his consciousness, barely keeping his head above water.

_Just die, you're useless._

He struggled to grab control of himself, but couldn't hold on any longer.

_Crash._

Doctor barely registered the car colliding with him. Unconscious by the time he hit the windshield, the buzz in the man's head was blessedly silent.

--

Groggily, he opened heavy eyelids. Blinked slowly. Inhaled deeply.

The air was different. Crossing his eyes, he saw. Oh, oxygen mask. Okay. He looked further downward.

Cast on his arm. He supposed it was from impacting the windshield.

Casts on his legs, too, those were probably from the front end of the car.

Needle in his arm. Painkillers? Most likely.

He could see the rest of the room, in a severe blur. Glasses were gone, then, too.

A dark shape to his left, settled on what he assumed was a chair.

To his right were large windows, shades drawn. Doctor never really did like spending time in the sun, but usually, they never did that in hospitals.

"Who..." He spoke, experimentally, warm breath fogging the plastic mouthpiece. Decided he didn't like how his voice sounded at that moment.

He was answered all the same,"Me, of course. I'm glad you're awake, Doctor-san," the shape spoke, moving closer and sliding into focus. Xiao. Naturally. Kanzaki managed a half smile, furious with himself, but determined not to show it. How could he have been so stupid? Now there was an even greater debt he owed Xiao. Fantastic.

The other was smiling, which surprised Doctor. If the situation were reversed, he'd probably never have come to visit Xiao.

Originally, Doctor thought that the Number and he were very much alike, but this proved him wrong. The short-haired man removed the mask with his good arm, "Why did you come to see me?" Damn, he still sounded so _weak._

"I'm paying for your care, I should make sure they're doing a good job,"Xiao said casually, none of the usual undertones of agenda hidden in his words. Doctor supposed he believed that Kanzaki wasn't up to mental games just yet.

Or... Was it something else?

"Why do you take care of me?" instinctively, Doctor avoided meeting the other's eyes as he asked, staring at his right hand.

A little taken aback by the question, Xiao paused a moment, then began saying, quietly,"I think... I think it was to satisfy my curiosity, at first."

"Is that all I am to you? A curiosity?"

"Honestly, I don't know. You're not just _that,_ you're... Something else. Different. I don't know what, but it's very different."

Doctor smiled, "Something else, eh? Mm. Lin?"

Startled by Kanzaki calling him by something much more familiar, all Xiao coud do was say,"Yes?"

"Thank you," Kanzaki said, closing his crimson eyes. Xiao flopped back in his seat, a deep warmth bubbling up inside him.


End file.
